She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Randomize
