And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
My vagina is officially offended.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Randomize