I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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