mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
