i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
