I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
My day in three words: secret purse cake
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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