i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize