wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Randomize
