I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
