I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
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