I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
