Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
