Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
