Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
