Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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