i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
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