I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I think i got beer on your cat.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
