How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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