she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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