i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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