I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Randomize
