I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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