I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
