i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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