I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
