If i come over, it means nothing
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize