sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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