Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
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