It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
