you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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