I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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