How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
