used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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