I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
