My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
