He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
