I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize