some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
