have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
