Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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