Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Randomize
