he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize