Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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