let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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