tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Less talking, more tequila
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Randomize
