I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
