and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
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