Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
