Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Randomize