Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize