i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
